I need to detoxe. I’ve been eating so much crap and I don’t even enjoy it anymore! I feel like my body is running on empty. I stopped drinking coke 6 months ago and I don’t really eat sugary junk food, but I just feel sickened by the thought of eating another trans fat. My problem is really two fold. I’m lazy about food, which means I put off eating until I’m so hungry I just want to eat something fast, like chips or pizza. I really have to snap out of that. So today I actually ate a breakfast! Ok not till like 5 hours after I got up, but it was before noon so it still counts. Bran oatmeal, with raisins, walnuts and dried cranberries. And tonight I will actually eat a real dinner and not just a frozen pizza! I don’t know why I have this problem. It’s really nuts because I love food so why do I put off eating it? Like breakfast. Me of all people should want to wake up and eat, but I don’t. I wake up and drink copious amounts of coffee until I’m either shaking with a low blood sugar attack, or feel sick. Then I’ll eat like a pound of pasta and a bag of chips and 2 pies and a gallon of milk and a bag of cookies. Then I throw it up. I just threw that in there to liven up a pointless and boring post. Plus my teeth and hair are falling out and I desperately need help. Haha bulimia is funny.
Tags: food
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I’ve never been a breakfast eater either and I don’t know why. Sometimes I do just like you though, figure that this is it, now I’m going to start eating breakfast. I usually last one day. I’m just not hungry when I wake up. Sometimes I’m even sickened just by thinking of eating in the morning. And sometimes it’s quite OK. I’ve never been able to eat breakfast two days in a row though. The second day I just can’t bring myself to it. Note that these breakfast experiments have been like 1 sandwich, not like a full breakfast. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to bring myself to eat that much in the morning. Lately I’ve experimented with one boiled egg in the morning and it was quite OK for a few days. But then I started being sickened by it and quit.
My uncle haven’t had a breakfast for 30 years, since he was about 15 years old. This summer when he was up working on our house up in northern Sweden, he woke up during the night with what he described as “the most excruciating pain I’ve ever ever felt”. He had a kidney stone. He had to pee it out. Doctor said too much coffee. Go figure. Aaanyway, fuck that. I can pee a stone any day, I’m not giving up my coffee.
When it comes to eating habits, I think I’m much like you, I can sometimes go two days without eating. Then when I eat I’ll eat anyting, I’ll eat a lot and I’ll usually feel like I’m going to die after I’ve eaten. Then there’s of course grades to it and sometimes my habits are quite regular, but yes I also consistently go hungry for too long before eating. It’s just that I’ve gotten used to this. My body tells me “hey I’m hungry” and my psyche answers “not hungry enough!“.
I did give up coke (and similar) a short while after I moved away from Linköping though. I haven’t had that stuff in years. It’s one of the few good decisions in my life. Believe me, you won’t regret giving it up. Try drinking coke in another 6 months and you’ll see. It’s fucking vile.
To conclude. I don’t believe in detox. Or rather I don’t believe in making a huge project out of it that involves drastically changing your habits and/or addictions. That is bound to fail.
Baby steps, baby steps.
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I’d also like to add that this is not completely true, there was one experiment where I tried doing some exercise right when I wake up, like go out running or do a bunch of pushups. Then I could totally eat breakfast after that. But the problem is I could never keep that up, I just don’t feel like doing that every day. Sometimes you have bad days, and then you’re fucked.
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Yeah your right, baby steps.. I mean I know I’m not going to start eating three square meals a day. That’s just not in the cards for me. But I should try to eat something before noon at least. (which I’ve already failed at today) But I realized last night what I really want to do it just stop eating chips, like I did with the coke. I agree coke is just vile and honestly that’s how I feel about chips now. So that’s what I’m doing. At least for awhile until they aren’t vile anymore.
Now I should go eat something.
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